Compassion pt.1 : Racism v. racism

Details have been changed and omitted to protect the innocent.  Or, perhaps, I should say to protect the guilty; insofar as we are all guilty to one extent or another.  

I was in the company of another person when they made a comment about an African-American individual and his sagging pants.

"The black community is far from the only one that wears their pants like that."

"Yeah, but we all know where it started," they replied.

It wasn't until weeks later, when reviewing the exchange again, that I realized something.  I gave this person an opportunity to amend their statement, and instead they doubled-down on it.  The odd thing is that I'm pretty sure this person doesn't consider themselves a racist.  

I separate this kind of prejudice in my head into two categories: racism and Racism.  We've seen the Racism coming out in full force since the 2016 election.  It waves NAZI or Confederate flags and sings lovesongs to Hitler.  It relies on theatrics and shock.  I won't say that there isn't a problem here, but honestly I consider it the lesser of the two evils.  Let them come forward and have their protests, and let the Sant-Sipahi (Saint-Soldiers) remind them that the world rejected their ideology and will continue to reject it - by force if necessary.  Give them their right to free speech so that we can remind them to shut-up.

racism is the much bigger problem.  I started that sentence with a lower-case letter for a reason. racism is far more insidious.  It affects everyone whether they realize it or not.  I'm certainly guilty of it.  I've caught myself grabbing my wallet and preparing for a fight when a group of young black men walk past me in New York.  I've called someone a rich, white, douche when they're driving unsafely in a high-end luxury vehicle or sports car.  I've made assumptions and cast judgement, and the only difference between me and the individual I referred to in the beginning is that when I catch myself doing it I stop myself.  I recognize the problem, and I quash it – if only at a later time.

What makes racism so much worse than Racism?  Most people don't recognize it when they're doing it.  I have another acquaintance that no matter how egregious the offense will always side with police.  Philando Castile?  "Well we just don't know what happened."  Eric Garner?  "We don't know the whole story."  Freddie Gray?  "Didn't you hear?  He did it himself," they say with something akin to smugness.  It shocks me because otherwise they're an incredibly kind person.  I don't know whether the officers involved in these cases were racists or Racists, but it's foolish to think that race didn't play a part; and it is absolutely racist to defend their actions or celebrate when they're let off the hook.

From my perspective the biggest cause of racism is a general lack of compassion.  The world has gotten smaller, and yet it seems like we're further apart than ever.  We see everyone through the lens of "the other".  It doesn't matter if it's the political-other, the racial-other, the socioeconomic-other, the religious-other, etc.  People are generally good, and yet when we view through the lens of the other we have a harder time living up to our potential.  I'm not saying anything new or profound here.  

"But everyone is a little bit racist, so what's the big deal?"  And just about everyone agrees that racism is bad; therefore it's our obligation, if not our duty, to defeat it - starting within ourselves.  So how do we combat it?  Start by recognizing when you do it.  Clean up your own house as best you can; then politely help others clean up theirs.  Use your compassion to help them find their compassion.  Find the little bit of God in yourself, and help them find theirs.  If we are part of God, and God is Nirbhau (without fear) and Nirvair (without hate), then by connecting with that piece of God inside us we too can be without fear or hate.

Compassion is one of the corner-stones of Sikhi.  Sri Guru Granth Sahib regularly talks about how we are all one:

ਸਭ ਮਹਿ ਵਸੈ ਪ੍ਰਭੁ ਏਕੋ ਸੋਇ ॥

He is the One God, abiding within all.

ਗੁਰਮਤੀ ਘਟਿ ਪਰਗਟੁ ਹੋਇ ॥

Through the Guru's Teachings, He is revealed in the heart.

ਸਹਜੇ ਜਿਨਿ ਪ੍ਰਭੁ ਜਾਣਿ ਪਛਾਣਿਆ ॥

One who intuitively knows and realizes God,

ਨਾਨਕ ਨਾਮੁ ਮਿਲੈ ਮਨੁ ਮਾਨਿਆ ॥੪॥੧॥

O Nanak, obtains the Naam; his mind is pleased and appeased. ||4||1||

  

[Sidenote: Some scholars translate Naam as meaning the name of God.  Others, however, interpret it more to mean the nature of God.  I prefer this perspective.  If I know someone’s name, I still no nothing about them.  If I understand their nature, then I can truly connect with them and truly know them.  I could try to describe the nature of God, but being as I have not obtained it, it would be pointless.  It’s in their somewhere, but I need to connect to my compassion first.]

ਸਹਸ ਤਵ ਨੈਨ ਨਨ ਨੈਨ ਹਹਿ ਤੋਹਿ ਕਉ ਸਹਸ ਮੂਰਤਿ ਨਨਾ ਏਕ ਤਦ਼ਹੀ ॥

You have thousands of eyes, and yet You have no eyes. You have thousands of forms, and yet You do not have even one.

ਸਹਸ ਪਦ ਬਿਮਲ ਨਨ ਏਕ ਪਦ ਗੰਧ ਬਿਨੁ ਸਹਸ ਤਵ ਗੰਧ ਇਵ ਚਲਤ ਮੋਹੀ ॥੨॥

You have thousands of Lotus Feet, and yet You do not have even one foot. You have no nose, but you have thousands of noses. This Play of Yours entrances me. ||2||

Compassion is the answer to dealing with lower-case r racists.  Live the example.  Show it to yourself when you find yourself in a situation where that stray thought enters your mind.  Show it to others when they make a less-than-kind comment.  If you respond to their shitty comment with your own shitty comment, then all you’ve done is doubled that pile of poop.  Show them you love them as you point out the problem inherent in their statement.  Be prepared to deal with their shame (and regardless of their reaction it will be fueled by shame) with patience and understanding.  Help them understand the beautiful uniqueness of the other, while also pointing out the similarities.  Don’t so much try to shatter then lens as to melt it with the warmth of love and kindness.

When we do our best to be compassionate and deal with racism, then Racism will largely disappear; but if we handle racists with hatred and vitriol, then they’re pushed one step closer to becoming Racists.  Not out of an actual hatred for other races; but out of resentment, rejection, and fear.  Nirbhau and Nirvair are the answer.  God is the answer.  We are the answer.